How to impress a girl 101
by EK
Summary: COMPLETE. post-Second Stage Bart is out to get Meia's attention--and who does he ask for help!
1. getting a teacher

Hello everybody! I'm EK, and this is my first fic for anything other than Rurouni Kenshin (for RK I have 5). ^^ Hope you like it!  
  
Set AFTER Second Stage, so while I will avoid spoilers, there might be a few that will get in. And, I will be using, without apology, the AXN variation of the place and character names.  
  
...........  
  
"Please, vice-captain! I need your help!"  
  
BC did not look up from her calculations at the control panel.  
  
"This is a matter of life and death, your leader-ship, your highness, your majesty...."  
  
"Cut the honorifics, Garsus. I have work to do."  
  
Chief Pilot Bart Garsus slunk away.  
  
The Nirvana was used now mostly as a transport vehicle, an interplanetary link between Meger and Talark. For the most part, whenever the men were around, they still filled their regular places. Bart is still the only pilot of the Nirvana, the only human being that could actually get the spaceship moving.  
  
At this particular time and place, the known crew of the Nirvana was complete. It was Meia's birthday in a few days, and they were all there to celebrate.  
  
Bart tried again a few hours later, when he saw the vice-captain alone on the second deck.  
  
"Vice-captain, can I talk to you now?"  
  
"You definitely are persistent."  
  
He shrugged. "Comes naturally, I guess." He took out a notebook. "Um, if you please, vice-captain, could you help me with something?"  
  
BC waved a nonchalant hand. "As you wish." She put a hand to the brooch on her neck.  
  
"No, no, no, DON'T do that, vice-captain....I'd rather talk to you this way, I prefer this voice," Bart begged desperately. "At any rate, it's just about the lead Dread pilot......"  
  
"Meia?"  
  
"Yes, erm, vice-captain. Um, what would you suggest for a birthday gift? You've known the crew for quite a while, so I could use a little help."  
  
"And why would you actually go through all this trouble, Garsus?"  
  
Bart began to rant and rave. "I'd like that ice queen to notice me, vice-captain! She's smart, she's tough, she's brave, and she's also beautiful! If I could even get three words off duty out of her, I'd be one of the happiest men on Talark!"  
  
"Pai check!" The announcement came from a far corner of the second deck. "Bart is still after BC?!" Obviously the girl had not established audio links to the conversation.  
  
"Why Meia, Garsus?" BC asked suspiciously.  
  
"I don't know, vice-captain! I just like something about her, I guess. It's quite the same thing I found in you, actually, before....um, you know....anyway, I'd like to know how to get her attention, to give me a chance to show what I feel, you understand, vice-captain..."  
  
"So you mean to say, Garsus, you want advice in how to get close to a woman," BC summarized.  
  
"Well, that about sums it up," Bart sheepishly agreed.  
  
"I suppose you've learned from experience that your current techniques are insufficient."  
  
He scratched his head in embarrassment, remembering dozens of failed attempts to catch BC's attention.  
  
Paiway inched closer to the two, in an effort to overhear the conversation.  
  
"Come to my room, we'll talk about it," BC stated.  
  
"Pai check!! Now THIS is interesting!" Paiway was furiously scribbling and taking pictures.  
  
"Really, vice-captain, you'll help me?!" Bart suddenly held both BC's hands in his, in great joy.  
  
"Yes already, Garsus!"  
  
Bart was unable to control himself. He bounded and embraced BC at the neck. "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!"  
  
"What are you snooping at now, Pai?" Dita tapped her from behind. Paiway merely pointed at Bart and BC. The chief pilot was all over the vice- captain, smothering her with kisses to her cheeks. Dita shook her head and rubbed her eyes twice to confirm what she was seeing.  
  
"Compose yourself, Chief Pilot," BC rather forcefully pushed him aside. "I am still on duty. I have to get back to the control room."  
  
"8 o'clock then, vice-captain? Your room?" Bart cheerfully asked.  
  
"Hai, hai.." and BC walked away.  
  
Dita and Paiway could not believe their ears.  
  
"Paiway to Jura and Amarone, Paiway to Jura and Amarone," Paiway contacted. "We have to talk to you guys about a video link tonight!"  
  
...........  
  
For those of you who know what I've been trying NOT to say outright, understand that I'm sticking to feminine pronouns, but I'll also try to avoid using pronouns at all. Every Vandread fan is bound to know eventually, but I'd rather it not come from me. ^^ Not unless, enough of you know already, and you prefer that I be frank about it.....  
  
I apologize for the shortness of this initial chapter. I'll make a longer one next time. Hope to see you again! 


	2. defining the objective of the course

Hello! I'm back! Thanks for all the help and the suggestions, I needed that. Sorry, I know my RK better than my Vandread. ^^  
  
............  
  
"You saw Bart, HUGGING, BC?!" Barnette's jaw had dropped. Jura beside her was equally aghast.  
  
"Put in another way, the vice-captain allowed Bart to hug her?!" Amarone grilled Paiway.  
  
Paiway simply showed the incriminating evidence from her camera's picture files. Dita testified to also being present and seeing the inconceivable event.  
  
"Wonders on the Nirvana never cease..." Parfet commented, following the conversation from the engine room. Jura and Amarone quietly nodded.  
  
The women heard the swish of the door opening and closing. "What's all the fuss about, girls?" Hibiki entered the ship's rec room with a yawn.  
  
"Take a look," and Jura thrust the pictures before his face. The Vanguard pilot facefaulted.  
  
"I can believe that it's Bart, but how can I be sure YOU're not cosplaying as BC?"  
  
Jura Elden gave Hibiki Tokai a vicious bash to the head.  
  
"Oi, nobody hurts Dita's Uchuujin-san!" Dita glared fiery darts at Jura, then inquired about her alien's large bump.  
  
"So that means...that was really the vice-captain?!" Hibiki had a full look of fear, bump notwithstanding.  
  
"Dita is thinking," Dita stared up at the ceiling and tilted her head, "Bart-san likes the vice-captain, so what's wrong? This is normal in Meger, until we introduced the concept of inter-planetary relationships....."  
  
"You are COMPLETELY missing the point!" Hibiki yelled at her. "In Talark we DON'T have relationships like in Meger! This kind of thing is taboo, and puts soldiers in the slammer on a life sentence!"  
  
"Really?!" the rest of the women asked.  
  
"Really."  
  
The new information got the crew so rattled that party streamers, half- wrapped gifts, open recipe books, and confetti were strewn all over the rec room--------and nobody noticed that Meia had entered and left.  
  
Aforemetioned Meia exited the rec room and shrugged silently. Over the more than three years she had served Magno Vivan, she had gotten used to these birthday celebrations for her, that always tried to be a surprise but always failed.  
  
She made her way to the hangar to check up on her Dread.  
  
From another part of the same deck, Bart was going up to the hangar as well with a hop and a skip. He had to tell somebody, and only Hibiki would be ideal for the news. He would most probably be at the hangar, fixing up his Vanguard again. Duero was no fun. If he told him, he would simply say "Omoshiroi...," and leave it at that. But Hibiki might be able to give a few more tips about Meia along the way. After all, he's been with her more often, on all those missions and attacks.  
  
Lost in their own thoughts, neither Bart nor Meia realized that they headed on a direct collision course with each other. At full speed, Bart completely ran into Meia.  
  
Nirvana pilot and chief Dread pilot fell to the floor, with the young man on top of the young woman.  
  
He shook his head furiously to clear his thoughts, and to know exactly what hit him. Suddenly he realized that he was staring down at the face of his current infatuation. Ah, life doesn't get any better than this!! But what the heck would he say to her? How do you say 'how do you do' to the ice queen?  
  
After a few long seconds of enjoying a full view of her sullen face and blue-gray hair from such a close proximity, he realized the discourtesy of their position, and quickly stood in apologetic attention. "Me-Me-Meia...so- so-sorry for bumping into you....you, you see, Ma'am, I was on my way to the control room..and, and, and..."  
  
"No harm done," she curtly assured him. She stood up as well and turned her back on him.  
  
He was desperate, he was confused, and he was unsure of what to do. He employed his current techniques, knowing nothing else. He drew himself to his full military form, cleared his throat, and lowered his voice. "Uh, um, wh-wh-where would such a beautiful girl like you be headed?"  
  
She batted her eyes at him. "None of your business."  
  
He returned to normal mode, and trailed after her. "Aw, come on, Miss Meia, have a heart, I'm trying to be nice!"  
  
"Try harder," she replied without looking back.  
  
He sighed and rubbed his dome head.  
  
He definitely needed the vice-captain on this one.  
.............  
  
Omoshiroi---Interesting  
  
I think only the okashira (boss) calls BC by name, and everyone else calls BC as "vice-captain".  
  
Sabbie-History will come, after a while, not as soon as it was given in White and Black. I shed a few tears over Second Stage ep 3 too! I loved Bart in that ep. I'll try to lessen the suck-up-ness. ^^  
  
ShadowD-BC OOC? But, urm, she, got a bit nicer over the course of Second Stage. That's why ep 10 is SUCH a shocker. Ok, I'll see what I can do.  
  
Megane-san87-Thanks for reminding me about Paiway. I'll get Duero to remind her eventually. ^^  
  
USSKenji-Thanks for the support!  
  
The Untalkative Bunny-I've yet to see Snow Queen, but I'd like to!  
  
Aoikachina_KWT-Seriously, Bart and Meia are a more compatible match than Bart and BC. They're about the same age, and they're opposites so they compliment each other. The Hibiki/Meia pairing is mostly a fanfic writer thing.  
  
Martina-I suppose most people know, but for safety's sake I'm still not saying it outright for now. I'd like people to have the same shock I got when I saw ep 10. ^_^V I literally went AAAAACK!! I've already told a cousin of mine who hasn't seen most of Second Stage that Hibiki is older than he is, but I've never told her about BC!  
  
Thanks for the reviews everybody! I hope to sustain a wild ride. Suggestions will always be welcome. Until next time! 


	3. one hour before the first class

Hello! Thanks for coming back! Sorry I took a while. My mind was stuck for a while with White and Black. ^^ Once again, I am trying to avoid pronouns, but when absolutely necessary I will use feminine ones to be on the safe side. ^_^V  
  
.........  
  
"One hour to go," Paiway reminded the crew from the medical station, relayed over the general intercom. "One hour before 8 o'clock."  
  
"What are you so worried about, Pai?" Amarone replied from the bridge. "Bart isn't known for his punctuality."  
  
"I thought you have had enough of snooping around..." Duero quietly noted, not lifting his eyes from the keyboard of the clinic's main computer.  
  
"Well, for the most part," Paiway twiddled her little thumbs-then took out her green frog puppet. "But wouldn't YOU want to know too why Bart is going to the vice-captain's room tonight, kero-kero?"  
  
"He is?" Duero stopped typing for a second and looked at his nurse.  
  
The nurse nodded her puppet's head.  
  
The worthy doctor put a hand to his chin, and the eye unhidden by straight black hair began to sparkle. "Omoshiroi...."  
  
"Told ya," Paiway quipped.  
  
"So Pai has finally told you, Doctor?" Parfet sweetly inquired from the engine room. She punched a few buttons and informed Paiway, Amarone, and Jura. "The video hookup is almost complete. It will be live, in closed- circuit TV! We'll be ready just in time for it."  
  
Amarone almost replied to the transmission, when BC suddenly peered over her shoulder. "Ready for what? Is there an attack I don't know about yet?"  
  
She quickly cut the transmission and looked sheepishly at BC. "Oh, no, everything's fine, vice-captain. It's something about Meia's party, don't worry." Then she tried to hasten the event they wanted to see. "You go on back to your quarters, vice-captain, and take your beauty rest. The three of us here have everything under control."  
  
"Ah....if you say so," BC raised an eyebrow, and exited with the soldierly grace unique to herself.  
  
Not that BC was unwilling to leave the Nirvana to Amarone's capable hands, but there was something odd about her responses that made BC wonder what was going on. Probably another one of those snooping video feeds, BC correctly deduced. After all, she had been with the crew long enough to know about these things. Slightly annoying, but harmless. BC decided to ignore it and head back to her quarters.  
  
In the lower decks of the Nirvana, the chief pilot was trying out a few new clothes he managed to pick up from Talark.  
  
"Whaddayathink?" he asked Hibiki, as he posed before him.  
  
"Gimme a break, Bart," Hibiki commented, sitting up on his bed with hands behind his head. "You're just going to see the vice-captain...."  
  
"HOW do you know?!"  
  
"Don't give me that-----don't tell me you didn't know the crew locked me up with that woman a few months back!" Hibiki declared. "Absolutely NOTHING happens on this ship that those 150-something girls don't know about!"  
  
The pilot sweatdropped. Hibiki was right. "Demo saa," he continued, "I still have to look presentable to hi---um----he---um-----the vice- captain, ne?"  
  
"Just one question-------WHY?!"  
  
"Why what?"  
  
"Why the heck are you doing this?! I thought you were through with the vice-captain!"  
  
"And I am...."  
  
"Well, then..."  
  
"Well, I need the vice-captain's advice on a few things..." Bart rubbed his shiny head.  
  
"And just what kind of advice is that ol' stiff vice-captain going to give you?"  
  
"That's what I'm going to find out-------now, will you please tell me if I wear this shirt or this one?" he concluded, as he raised two shirts for Hibiki's perusal.  
  
Far away in her room, Meia received a video transmission. "Thirty minutes before showtime, Leader!" Dita happily announced.  
  
Meia cut her off.  
  
Dita appeared again in half a second. "Leader, it will be a live feed! The vice-captain is actually going to meet Bart-san!"  
  
"I don't care," Meia nonchalantly commented, as she took off her uniform and put on her sleepwear. "I'm going to bed."  
  
"Ooooh, Leader is jealous of the vice-captain?"  
  
"Nothing of the sort, Dita," she replied. "Now leave me be." She cut her off for good.  
  
Meia, however, started to think about it. The Nirvana pilot was acting rather peculiar a few hours ago. He said he was trying to be nice....and, well...he wasn't too good at it yet, but it felt unusual to have someone trying to be nice to her. Unusual, in a good way. Hibiki had been nice to her, in a sociable way, as a team member. The boss had been nice to her, in a motherly way. The rest of the crew had been nice to her countless times, in a friendly way. But Bart was trying to be nice in another way....and definitely, she did not know how to handle it.  
  
As a wise commander, she decided to learn more about this change in the Nirvana pilot. Sometimes insignificant events lead to situations that require action. It could not hurt to know more, she thought.  
  
Five minutes before 8 o'clock, she laid back in her bed, and pressed a button on her lampstand. "Computer, access the live video feed," she instructed.  
  
Shortly a holographic screen appeared in front of her, showing the interior of BC's personal quarters. The vice-captain was pacing the room, still wearing the sleeveless top and baggy soldier's breeches.  
  
In countless holographic screens all over the pirate ship, crew members were also tuning in to the video feed. Parfet had the whole transmission up and ready to go. Even the two other men on the ship had screens on the event. They were kind enough-or smart enough--not to tell the target, though.  
  
They were not disappointed.  
  
At exactly the time appointed, a knock was heard on BC's door. This was followed by the swoosh of opening and closing.  
  
"Vice-captain," the guest began with his best military tone. "Thank you for having me." He continued with all suavity and confidence befitting the businessman in his genes. "I am sure I have come to the right place. You are the best source of information.."  
  
"Never mind that, Garsus," BC halted the pilot, bedecked in normal khaki pants over tasteful black shoes, a black skin-tight shirt under a smart leather jacket. "Although, I have to admit, you have good taste in clothes."  
  
Meia found her head nodding.  
  
BC waved the guest to a chair, and sat serenely in another chair three feet away from him.  
  
"Now, Garsus, what do you want to know?"  
  
............  
  
Demo saa-However  
  
Omoshiroi-Interesting  
  
Unproductivity-Sorry you were missed in the chapter 2 responses. Believe ep 11. I know it's hard, but believe it. Be thankful that you're not Bart Garsus, poor chap. ^^ Oh, yeah, I already felt sorry for him in ep 3, I felt worse in ep 10. AWFUL, to trick an 18-year-old lovestruck pilot like that!!  
  
Sabbie-I can relate with your boyfriend. When Touya was gunned down in Ayashi no Ceres, I went "Oh, MAN, why?!" I felt awful for Aya. But at the end of Vandread Second Stage ep 10, I felt awful for the entire Nirvana crew, for Bart, for Magno Vivan, for myself, for the general viewing public in Japan and in Asia and in the United States!! Because it's not just being tricked about THAT, it's being tricked about everything else. That's why it's a bomber, and the best one I've ever encountered in anime.  
  
Megane-san_87-You a Kogure fan by any chance? ^^ Thanks for liking it. We'll see what we can do about your requests.  
  
BKM2K3-Thanks for liking it! I hope you're satisfied with the results!  
  
Aoikachina_KWT-Thanks for the support!  
  
The Untalkative Bunny-Yes, I'm continuing!  
  
MarekVII-Thanks for the support. Well, Bart somewhat deserves his reputation, but we do know he's trying to change.  
  
Thanks for reading! Hope you all come back! 


	4. first lecture

I'm still alive. I've just been busy with writeups and White and Black. I'm back. ^^  
  
.........  
  
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WE HAVE NO AUDIO?!"  
  
If such a thing as virtual strangling was possible, Jura Basil Elden would have reached out through her monitor and grappled Parfet Balblair.  
  
"I don't know why, but I can't get audio out of the link!" Parfet was furiously punching buttons and checking all connections.  
  
"WELL, DO SOMETHING!!"  
  
"Check at your end, too, Jura! Check the cables!"  
  
Meia was the only one on the whole Nirvana who was not freaking out. As it was, it seemed like Bart and BC were only talking business. Nothing interesting. She shut off the transmission, and tried to sleep.  
  
"DITA!! You tripped on some cables again, didn't you?!" Barnette accused.  
  
"You are not being fair to Dita!" Dita herself protested. "Dita hasn't been down to the engine or to the electronics room all day! I've just been fixing the decorations for the party, remember?"  
  
The overbearing presence of the okashira suddenly appeared on the main screen of the rec room. "What is all that noise down there? I can hear all the shouting from my bedroom!"  
  
"BOSS! We thought you were asleep!" Jura stammered. "Parfet!! The rec room's connected to the main line!!"  
  
Just then the artillery manager walked through the rec room's door, calmly chewing on a piece of straw. "Nobody in the whole ship could get any sleep with all that racket. Now will you all please calm down....and repeat after me..."  
  
"Smile....smile...yes, we know, Gasco-san," Barnette sighed.  
  
Misty Cornwell appeared through the main screen. "WHAT is all that noise?! I wanna hear Bart talking! You're all so noisy, I can't get these cables right!"  
  
The blue-haired girl was tangled around wires and cables slithered all over the floor.  
  
"MISTY! So you're the one at communications! Fix the cables, hurry!!" Parfet ordered.  
  
"WHICH ONE, Parfet?!"  
  
"Try them all!"  
  
Meanwhile, Amarone was still glued to the small room where BC and Bart were talking. She was unable to make out any of Bart's words, or his dramatic flourishes and gestures. He even kneeled before BC now.  
  
"Guys, I think you might want to take a look at this...." she slowly announced.  
  
Everyone stopped what they were doing or panicking about, grew silent, and focused on the main screen.  
  
The chief pilot was still kneeling, holding the vice- captain's hands inside his. His eyes were imploring, begging.  
  
"He's PROPOSING?!" someone asked.  
  
"Dita doesn't think so; Dita hasn't seen a ring," that worthy redhead noted.  
  
"What's the ring for, Dita?" Hibiki innocently asked.  
  
"You mean, you don't know?!" Misty found it hard to believe.  
  
"You can tell him later," Jura ordered. "Now hush! And FIX those cables!!"  
  
Whatever it was that Bart was saying and gesticulating, the vice-captain was shaking her head to it consistently. BC's arms were now folded over that full chest, and her arms assumed a stern look.  
  
"Rejected!" Misty anchored from the communications deck.  
  
"WHERE IS THE AUDIO, MISTY?!" more than fifty voices chorused.  
  
"I'm working on it, but there are too many cables and too many connections!"  
  
"Dita will help!"  
  
"You will do no such thing, Dita!" Parfet stopped her.  
  
"Will everyone keep quiet please, I'm watching!" Celtic sweetly asked from inside a bear costume. They all piped down.  
  
The vice-captain stood up, rather forcefully, and pressed on the brooch on her neck.  
  
General "uh-oh" from the virtual audience.  
  
With hands on hips, BC evidently gave the pilot a good long sermon, on something. The vice-captain paced the floor, as the pilot's desperately, well, desperate, eyes looked at her moving left to right. It was the interrogator hunting down the guity interrogated.  
  
"I think the vice-captain is saying, 'Why can't you do it yourself?' " Barnette tried to translate the lip movements.  
  
The artillery manager leaned on a post and amusedly observed the motley crew. "It's not my problem," Gascogne began, "but it isn't any of yours, either, so why don't you all just go to bed?"  
  
Bart in the meantime had thrown himself down at BC's feet, almost kissing the vice-captain's shoes. He bowed reverently before BC, and maintained the position for over five minutes.  
  
"I finally have the cables fixed!" Misty announced. She plugged two wires together. "There, that should do it!"  
  
They saw Bart put an end to the bowing and kowtowing. The vice-captain had turned her back on him. They remained motionless for five minutes, as the rest of the crew kept silence for about as long, eagerly anticipating each breath, waiting for the first audible word.  
  
Finally, the pilot raised his head. He looked intently at the back of the vice-captain, and opened his mouth.  
  
It was a manly voice that rang through the ship.  
  
"You know, I'm not good with the dramatic, romantic things. I only know myself, and I know I'm not exactly a lovable person. But give me a chance, I will prove to you, that I could do it. I could show you, I could tell you. I like you very much."  
  
Silence reigned again.  
  
Jaws dropped throughout the Nirvana, male and female alike.  
  
Buzam Calessa pressed the neck brooch once again.  
  
A deep, gentle, womanly voice was heard. "Very good. Come back tomorrow."  
  
Eyes bulged wide.  
  
Just then a shrill piercing din buzzed through the audio system. Everyone had hands to their ears in a millisecond.  
  
"Parfet! What is that infernal noise?!" the boss demanded from her bedroom.  
  
Parfet was too busy checking the controls to reply. Misty was likewise busy, pulling all plugs and cables.  
  
The rest could not reply either. Someone new had appeared on the main screen, and they were scared speechless.  
  
"What is that racket? Who's been tampering with the video and audio links again?"  
  
It was the vice-captain.  
  
"Who is responsible for this breach?"  
.........  
  
You're all free to imagine. I'll write out what really happened in the next chappie. ^^  
  
USS Kenji--- Hope you liked the result of the cliffhanger!  
  
Sabbie-I think she is, I'll see what I can do about that. ^^  
  
Megane-san_87---Don't worry, it won't be ending soon! I like Kogure because sometimes he's the only sane person in all of Slam Dunk, aside from Coach Anzai. ^^ And he's the peacemaker by default. I also like Sendoh, by the way.  
  
BKM2K3-Here's the next serving!  
  
Aoikachina_KWT-We'll see, we'll see what I can do.  
  
Cinderella_sematan-Thanks a lot! I'll be continuing!  
  
The untalkative bunny-Well, we'll see about Meia and her reactions eventually. ^^  
  
Mister kungfu-Romantic scene? Maybe over time, but not so soon.  
  
Zauriel-Thanks! I'll be continuing. ^^  
  
Thanks for waiting, and I hope you liked this chappie! 


	5. recess after first class

Hello everybody! Glad you're back! Sorry for the long wait. I was winding up White and Black. Hopefully I'll alternate submission of How to Impress a Girl 101 and Fire and Magic over this summer. ^^ All of you can thank Beko for getting me back to writing this.  
  
Starting from around this point, I'll be presenting BC as, well, what BC really is. ^^ I will keep the pronouns for safety purposes, though.  
  
........  
  
"Well? Who is responsible for the communication breach?"  
  
A deathly silence descended over the Nirvana. Parfet was gesturing to the crew in general and to Jura in particular. Jura looked at Barnette and Dita and Amarone. Amarone bit her lip as she looked at the rest of the crew. Cold beads of perspiration dotted Misty's forehead. "This is not good, kero-kero!" Paiway commented.  
  
"Meia, acknowledge!" the vice-captain commanded over the system.  
  
The chief pilot eventually appeared on screen, with slightly rumpled hair and rubbing her eyes. "Hai, vice-captain," she acknowledged, with her usual calm.  
  
"Meia, could you explain what the ringing noise was a few seconds ago?"  
  
"They were fixing the communication cables this evening," she quietly explained.  
  
"Who were 'they'?" the vice-captain inquired. The main accomplices began to quiver in their shoes.  
  
"I did not bother to know, vice-captain," she answered simply.  
  
"Alright. All of you, as you were," BC ordered. "Go to sleep!"  
  
A united sigh of relief, on all sides. Communication to the room was cut for the night.  
  
Back at BC's quarters, a very relieved navigator had fallen to his knees. "Yokatta! I thought Meia found out about this meeting too!"  
  
"Women, they're an annoying lot sometimes...." BC murmured with a slight smirk. To which Bart nodded.  
  
"I wonder how much those girls heard. I do want to make a good impression, you know."  
  
"I would not worry too much, Garsus. Your first attempts were horrible, but the last speech would make even the hardest-hearted woman relent a little. You made good progress. Like I said, come back tomorrow. I will see what I can do with Amarone."  
  
Bart shrugged, and exited the vice-captain's quarters, a little flustered, but still the easy-going optimistic pill salesman.  
  
On the part of the women, they were definitely coming back for more. As Dita said, in Meger this kind of thing was normal, but this was the first time they encountered it in the Talark residents. They wanted to find out how they went about it. They definitely wanted to found out how BC, of all people, went about it.  
  
"Alright, Bart Garsus, spill," Hibiki ordered, as the three men faced each other in their quarters.  
  
"'Bout what?" Bart confidently and nonchalantly crossed his arms and legs.  
  
"Exactly WHAT did you and BC do? What were you telling BC? You know it won't look good for either of you if this goes on...." Duero continued.  
  
Initially the navigator raised an eyebrow, then understood what the doctor was asking, and fell off his bed. "WHAT are you two talking about?! Nothing's going on between us!"  
  
"Tell that to the marines!" Hibiki snorted. " 'I could show you, I could tell you. I like you very much.'?! Puh-LEEZE!"  
  
While Bart was relieved that that was all the crew heard, he had to explain himself. "No! NO! You don't understand! Role-playing, that's all that was! I was trying to talk to give my feelings....to...to ...."  
  
"Meia?"  
  
"YES!"  
  
"Yeah, RIGHT!" Hibiki rolled his eyes at him. "That's just a cover. Admit it, Bart! You really like the vice-captain, even after all THAT..."  
  
"Garsus is telling the truth," a deep voice defended from the far end of their joint cell. He leaned on the wall, with a foot on it and arms crossed in front. "He really is trying to court the chief Dread pilot."  
  
"Omoshiroi," was all Duero noted. "What for?"  
  
"There will be a dance in a few days, if you not already aware," the new man explained. "The women are preparing that. Most of them have their partners. Hibiki has Dita, you have Parfet. Rebecca will be back for Ezra, and so on. Never mind me. Now the main person for all these festivities is Meia Gisborn. While she is indeed aware of the preparations, as she always is, she does not expect to be escorted and asked to dance. That, gentlemen, is what Bart Garsus will try to do."  
  
The doctor stroked his chin. The Vanguard pilot whistled in disbelief. Bart looked at the man like he was a traitor. The man just tossed his head and brushed his long platinum hair back.  
  
"This information is to be kept between us. The women should not know until then. You gentlemen should already know how dangerous information could be in the hands of inquisitive women," he warned.  
  
"Don't worry about us! None of them would believe us, anyway!" Hibiki harumphed. "The snow queen?"  
  
"They would believe anything, trust me," he returned. "Haven't YOU had enough of their attempts to pair you with the aforementioned snow queen?"  
  
"Well, now that you mention it...." the Vanguard pilot scratched his head in embarrassment.  
  
"I agree. They can assume plenty out of a little information," Duero added.  
  
And assume they did.  
  
As the men discussed the situation below deck, the women were holding a conference in the rec room.  
  
"There, at that point, they were fighting about something, right?" Dita asked.  
  
The video showed the Nirvana pilot hold the vice-captain by the chin, and bring his head nearer and his lips closer to her. She suddenly pushed him away, and wag an index finger. The pilot then went on a rampage, shouting and waving his arms in the air at her.  
  
"Hmmmmm...Bart was making an advance, but BC wasn't ready, so BC pushed him back." Barnette assessed.  
  
"He was moving too fast...." Amarone analyzed as well.  
  
"Ewwww, really," Misty cringed. "I can't get used to this kind of thing, even back on Earth before." Q nodded on her left shoulder.  
  
They returned toward the end of the recording, where BC smiled at the pilot and told him, rather sweetly, to come back tomorrow.  
  
"What did the vice-captain mean by that, 'Come back tomorrow'?" Jura wondered. "Would the vice-captain let him-----"  
  
"It's too soon," Barnette objected.  
  
"It's too soon for the likes of you!" Jura protested. "The likes of you need the end of the world to get you going!"  
  
"Just what do you mean by that, Jura?!" Barnette took out her pistol.  
  
"Why are you all still here?" Meia suddenly asked from behind them, holding a newly-acquired glass of milk from the kitchen.  
  
"Just t-t-talking, Meia," Jura sweetly stammered in reply, Barnette's one hand in her hair and the other holding the pistol to her head.  
  
"I suggest you all mind your own business. What Bart thinks of BC is his concern, not ours," Meia seriously declared, and exited the rec room.  
  
The Dread pilot returned to her quarters, and was rather surprised to find Bart Garsus by her door, wringing his hands. He still had on his stylish getup. Khaki pants, black shoes, well-pressed shirt, leather jacket.  
  
"H-h-hi, M-M-Meia," he nervously greeted, with a shaky wave of a hand.  
  
"Good evening," she tersely greeted back, still holding the glass of milk.  
  
"Listen, Miss Meia...I....um.....I don't know what you heard from what we talked about this evening....the vice-captain and I...." He kept looking down at the floor, and stole glances at her blue eyes every so often.  
  
"I went to sleep early," she simply said. His eyes lit up, and he looked up to heaven in gratitude.  
  
"Um, Miss Meia....I thought it was nice of you, not to squeal on the girls for the vice-captain." He smiled uneasily.  
  
"It was nothing," she returned a slight smile that sent the Nirvana pilot to 7th heaven.  
  
"I...um.....that's all I had to say, Miss Meia...." He then rubbed his perfect dome and looked at the floor again. "Oh, and I'm sorry for this morning."  
  
"No problem. Have a good night," she pressed on the wall, and made her door slide open.  
  
"Good night, Miss Meia, and thank you!"  
  
The Dread pilot disappeared from behind her door.  
  
He did not care what 149 women and three men thought of him right now.  
  
Meia Gisborn had smiled on him, and greeted him good night.  
  
He had a fighting chance!  
  
..........  
  
For all that I malign the girls here, I am a girl myself. ^^  
  
megane_san87-Hope you had a good night! ^^  
  
Sabbie-Arigatou! For all the support for both fics.  
  
Cinderella_semantan-Thanks much!  
  
Sir G-Oh, gomen kudasai. I hope this chappie clarifies things.  
  
Gundamhardcore-I like Gundam Wing and G too. I didn't like Gundam X too much though. ^^ Longer chapters? We'll see, but I still can't trust myself with my Vandread, the way I can with RK. Thanks for the support!  
  
Aoikachina_KWT-Yup, serve them right! ^^  
  
Alien freak?-Yes, I will continue.  
  
Bringer of Death-Thanks much. I'm writing this because I'm rather pro-H/D, and I never liked Bart and BC together! The age gap is way too steep! And I'm definitely not into that kind of pairing, if you know what I mean.  
  
Zauriel-Thanks! Will continue! Glad to hear from you!  
  
Misty Cornwell and Q-chan-Please take it easy, take it easy. ^^ Bart isn't too bad a guy, and he does look better without hair. You can ask Sabbie, I'm a little notorious for liking unliked characters, and pairing them with unlikely people!  
  
Mister_kungfu--SARS?! No thanks, I wouldn't want to put Bart in that kind of trouble!  
  
Beko-Thanks for putting me in the faves list! Sorry, I'm not so much for shonen ai. ^^ Thanks for liking the fic!  
  
That's all of you great reviewers. Thanks much and hope you keep reading! 


	6. hours before second class

Hello! Thanks everybody for reading! Vandread is back on TV in our place, and I'm so happy! It's a treat to watch First Stage again, already knowing Second Stage information. I hope the pronouns are not confusing you. I'm still trying to be on the safe side. I'd give away RK spoilers to anyone who asks. The major Vandread spoiler, I would rather you watch for yourself.  
  
Okashira-Boss, top man. Aoshi's position in the Oniwabanshuu-wait, this isn't RK.  
  
........  
  
"Bart!! Just where in the galaxy are you taking us?" the okashira had to ask.  
  
"Okashira, it seems that he's zig-zagging toward the nebula on our right," Ezra informed her.  
  
"Nirvana to navigator, Nirvana to navigator!" Amarone screamed from her console. "Snap out of it, Bart!"  
  
BC had a hand to her forehead as she shook her head.  
  
"BART GARSUS!!" Hibiki tried from beside Ezra.  
  
He popped up on the main screen, as if coming from a daze. "No need to shout, Hibiki! What do you want?"  
  
"What nebula are you taking us to, Bart?" Hibiki asked.  
  
"What nebula?"  
  
"I've had it," BC declared.  
  
She pressed a button, and withdrew the navigator from his virtual cockpit. In a second the Nirvana had ground to a halt, with its navigator sprawled on the entry deck. The vice-captain resolutely walked toward the navigator. In his shock he immediately rose to his feet in full attention. Soon she stood before him, face to face.  
  
BC gave Bart a hard smack across one cheek.  
  
Everyone froze in their places. The silence was equal to the outer space around them. The navigator held his cheek, and looked at the vice-captain with disbelief.  
  
"Get back to work," BC ordered, turned her back on him, and resumed her post.  
  
"Hai," Bart sulked, and jumped back into position.  
  
In the rec room, the little scene was the only topic of discussion.  
  
"Did Bart and the vice-captain have an argument we don't know about?" Jura inquired.  
  
"Not possible," Amarone replied, "We've kept tabs on both of them all day since last night, and they haven't even gotten close to each other!"  
  
"That's precisely the point," Barnette analyzed. "Maybe that's why they're not getting close to each other!"  
  
"Why are you all even bothering about this?" Gascogne asked near the door. "It's very simple, my dears. Bart was very distracted, and was about to get us into a storm nebula. Any vice-captain in her right mind would take drastic action."  
  
"But ours isn't just any vice-captain," Barnette harrumphed. Everyone else nodded.  
  
"But why was Bart so distracted?" Dita provided a follow-up question.  
  
"Aw, come on, Dita! Didn't you hear what Bart said to the vice-captain yesterday, and how she answered?" Misty replied.  
  
"Yare-yare.." Gascogne muttered from her corner.  
  
Meia had nothing to say to all this. She quietly listened to all the chatter, rather thankful they were chatting freely while she was around. Only a day before her birthday, and it was very unusual. Usually they brushed her off someplace else, away from the rec room and all the preparations. Now they were leaving her alone.  
  
Instead, they did it today to BC.  
  
When she appeared at the rec room for lunch, the girls one and all grew quiet. They looked at her top to bottom, and assessed each minute detail of her movements and demeanor.  
  
The vice-captain did not bother to satisfy them with a word. BC entered, got her lunch, exited.  
  
"Grumpy today, isn't she?" Dita noted.  
  
"Hai, kero-kero!" Paiway answered.  
  
The same was true in the male quarters.  
  
"You've had your head in the clouds all morning, Bart!" Hibiki waved a finger at him. "What's the matter with you?"  
  
"She smiled at me," he answered.  
  
"The snow queen, smiled at you?!"  
  
Bart nodded with a silly grin.  
  
"So what?!"  
  
"Have a heart, Hibiki!" Bart began. "I know what love is in Talark, and I've seen what love is in Meger. But this kind of feeling that I have right now, it's something neither our or their planet can compare! A woman, she sends a unique sensation to your brain. She's like you in genetic makeup, but she isn't. To win her affection is a totally exhilarating feeling! You know what I mean, Hibiki?....Hibiki?"  
  
But Hibiki had folded his arms before him, crossed his legs and shut his eyes, in deep thought. After two minutes of silence, he spoke.  
  
"It's an exhilarating feeling, alright. You feel the wind in your hair, and the thumping in your heart, as you run through the corridors, trying to stay away from those horrible hugs and kisses!"  
  
"You're being sarcastic, Hibiki!" Bart protested.  
  
"Try having Dita for a girlfriend!" Hibiki hissed.  
  
"I agree with you, Bart," Duero added. "It makes me a better doctor to have Parfet nearby..."  
  
"But, you, Bart, being in love makes you a scary navigator!!" Hibiki finished in exasperation.  
  
"I agree."  
  
The other male on the ship had once again appeared before them.  
  
"I've asked Ezra to put the Nirvana on autopilot until after the party. I don't know about Bart, but I definitely don't want to die yet."  
  
Bart reddened, and held his cheek again. Hibiki and Duero calmly nodded their heads.  
  
"You're here, sir, because...?" Hibiki had to ask.  
  
"Oh, yes. Could Bart have his next lesson here?"  
  
If Hibiki could 'Oro', he would have done that at this point. "Come again, sir?"  
  
"What lesson?" Bart asked.  
  
"Dancing. Ballroom dancing," the platinum-haired officer answered.  
  
"WHAT?!" Hibiki backed away.  
  
"Of course, I could teach you and McFile as well. You do have ladies to impress, right?" he continued smugly. "Talark festival dances are not their notion of a romantic evening."  
  
"Why not in your quarters?" Duero inquired.  
  
"Because the women are expecting us there, and they have their surveillance cameras ready. There is a better chance not to be discovered if we practice here."  
  
Duero shrugged. "No problem with me. It will be interesting, to say the least."  
  
"Same here," Hibiki added, "As long as the girls don't see us!"  
  
"I will make certain of that," the officer promised. "Eight o'clock tonight, then, Garsus. Get ready for a long night."  
  
The three gentlemen watched the dark breeches and tank-top uniform disappear at the corner.  
  
"Why is he being so nice?" Hibiki asked.  
  
"Out of guilt?" Duero guessed. "Remorse?"  
  
"No," the officer called out from the hall. "I don't want you gentlemen to make fools out of yourselves!"  
  
"Fair enough," they sweatdropped.  
  
Unfortunately, the platinum-haired officer was tailed.  
  
"Misty to Parfet, Misty to Parfet. Get an audio link to the lower deck." The communications officer paged.  
  
"There IS one, Misty!" Parfet answered.  
  
"Well, get one to the male quarters. Something's coming up at eight tonight! And get a video cable too!"  
  
"OK, I'll try, but the male quarters got flooded last week. All the lines there except for electricity are on the fritz."  
  
"Thanks, Parfet! I'm going to Jura and Amarone next!"  
  
.......  
  
Watching First Stage over, I'm so glad that, even if that character was a turncoat, it's heart was totally on the side of the Nirvana crew. ^_^  
  
Gundamhardcore-Thanks! I liked Gundam Wing best of all. For G I liked that French guy. ^^  
  
Sabbie-I will finish this, I promise..heck, I've promised lots of times. Difficulty? Maybe.. ^^  
  
Sir G-Thanks!  
  
Megane-san_87-Thanks much! Yes, I'll keep them guessing!  
  
Man-Thanks much!  
  
Mister kungfu@SMKK-- Enough about the SARS, please. Being lovesick is a problem enough without a real virus! ^^  
  
Cinderella_semantan-Yes, he'll be a gentleman. Thanks!  
  
Alien freak?-One giant leap for mankind! Thanks!  
  
Lord Mick-Thanks a lot!  
  
Aoikachina_KWT-Thanks much!  
  
Iudex Acerbus-Wow, arigatou gozaimashita! New guy? You don't know?! Or you know and you're just not letting on? ^^ If you really don't know, email me at ek_kaoru@yahoo.com and I'll give you the full spoiler. ^^ Thanks for reading!  
  
Fanfic reader-Thank you!  
  
Anon-Now, I update. Thanks!  
  
The untalkative bunny-Yes, I finally updated. Thanks!  
  
Wow! Lots of reviewers! Thanks a lot to everybody! 


	7. second class, finally

Hi! Sorry for the delay. I'm back in school, and this early in the game I already have a lot to study. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about this fic. ^^ When you have a fan of your work who is your classmate and your groupmate, you don't forget about a fic, ne, Hikari-san? Replies next time. Hopefully I'll have internet of my own by then. Sabbie-chan and tesuka-chan, Taming a Tiger is also up.  
  
..........  
  
"Say WHAT?!" Jura exclaimed.  
  
"What I said, Jura," Misty tried again. "They're meeting tonight! They're doing something weird tonight, and he's actually going to teach them!"  
  
"Who's he?"  
  
"HIM."  
  
"Him? You don't mean....are you sure?" Jura's eyes bulged. "Of all people? Why would he do that?"  
  
"Beats me-but don't you see?! We have to get a scoop!"  
  
"You're worse than Paiway nowadays, Misty, you know?" Jura sweatdropped. "Oh, great. Just when we have all this work to do for the party yet....."  
  
"We'll finish it this afternoon, and tomorrow morning, no problem. We'll be ready."  
  
Ready they definitely were not. Someone had only remembered at the last minute to lock all the Nirvana's exit points, to keep Meia from escaping again. Many were in a state of panic, hounding and searching the interplanetary shopping networks for party dresses. The cake was not chosen, the turkey still alive, the decorations still unhung. And most of the time, they forgot to keep an eye on Meia. The Dread pilot definitely knew that something was afoot for her.  
  
"Aren't YOU men in on the plot as well?" Meia asked them in quiet exasperation.  
  
Bart could not reply. Duero only rubbed his chin. "Um, well, the girls didn't give us anything to do," Hibiki calmly answered for them.  
  
In the meantime, the girls responsible for communications were hard at work, finding a way into the male quarters.  
  
"Why did we have to have a leak last week..." Parfet grumbled.  
  
"Isn't there any other way to get to there?" Amarone asked.  
  
"I'll try to get a camera in, but there's no way we can get audio.....unless....unless....wait, that just might work....."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You'll see. I'll be back," and Parfet headed to the supplies room.  
  
Parfet had pulled out the stops. She drew her trump card.  
  
Romantic influence.  
  
Duero enjoyed a calm afternoon at the medical ward. Paiway was helping the other women prepare for the party, and fortunately, nobody was getting injured. It was about to get better. The chief engineer had just popped her head at the door.  
  
"How's your day, Doctor?" Parfet asked with a smile.  
  
"Boring, for once," Duero returned a smile. "Taking a break from engineering, I see?"  
  
She nodded. With hands to her back, ponytails bobbing, she approached him. "Doctor.."  
  
He looked up from the computer, ever so slightly.  
  
"I have a little something for you, it it's alright, Doctor." Parfet opened her right hand. It held a collar pin. The doctor sat quietly as she pinned it on, his eyebrow raised as a question. "I made it myself," was all the explanation he got. "I hope you'll wear it always."  
  
"I don't see any reason not to," he answered, somewhat not himself. Then again, he was always somewhat not himself when Parfet was concerned.  
  
"Thanks a lot, Doctor!" and Parfet with a short look back exited the medical ward. So far, so good.  
  
Duero shrugged. "Omoshiroi..." He then returned to his computer files.  
  
Soon the pin was quite forgotten. And quietly recorded any and all audio from the medical ward.  
  
"You mean, Duero didn't suspect a thing?" Amarone asked in surprise, when Parfet told her.  
  
"I don't think so," she replied. "It works to our advantage, ne?" She gave Amarone the peace sign.  
  
"Well, we ARE desperate...but won't he get mad at you for being tricked?"  
  
"So I'll disable the recording mechanism when we're done!" Parfet protested. "I did want to give him that pin."  
  
For now, at least for the next twenty-four hours or so, it would tell Parfet about all Duero's conversations for the day. Hopefully, including the ones he would be having that evening.  
  
Eight o'clock arrived.  
  
A passive doctor leaned on his bed, reading a medical book. A cynical pilot had his arms folded and eyes closed while waiting. A nervous navigator wrung and unwrung his hands twice every five seconds.  
  
Their mentor eventually appeared. Still in uniform, and looking very sharp.  
  
"You were always a great dresser," Bart praised. It was ignored.  
  
"What about the girls?" Hibiki asked.  
  
The officer calmly raised a small device hidden in his right hand. "A scrambler," he explained. "Signals from here will only come to them as static."  
  
"You are underestimating Parfet," Duero said.  
  
"You are defending her work," the officer retorted. "I know quite well what she is capable of. I will not be surprised if they manage to get past this defense. But let us not worry about them, shall we?"  
  
Duero was quite correct in his defense. The recorder on his collar was anti-static, for the frequencies the officer employed.  
  
After a few minutes of scratching over the speakers, audio to the male quarters was restored.  
  
"Can't we have a little video over there, too?" Jura begged.  
  
"I've tried, but she knows that we do that, and the scrambler thing works against it," Parfet explained.  
  
More than 10 girls grumbled. "He's too good for your tricks, girls," Gascogne grinned.  
  
This evening, even Meia was intrigued. Hidden in her own room, she had the audio links open to the live feed.  
  
"Let us begin," their mentor for the night began, slightly scratchy to the listening audience. "We have to pair up. I will pair with Bart, Hibiki will pair up with Duero."  
  
The women could not believe their ears. Bart with, with, with HIM?!  
  
"But Duero is too tall!" Hibiki complained.  
  
The officer pointed to a pair of heeled boots.  
  
"No, thanks."  
  
"I thought so."  
  
On the other hand, Bart was positively shaking.  
  
"What's the matter with you?" Bart's dancing partner asked easily. "It's just a traditional way to favor your mate, nothing to it."  
  
"He's going to teach them mating rituals?!" the girls deduced.  
  
"The video links! The video links!" Others clamored. "Male mating rituals! This we gotta see!"  
  
"The static is too strong!" Parfet responded, already in her undershirt and sweaty.  
  
"Are you sure about this, sir?" Hibiki asked again.  
  
"I've known them for quite a while," he answered. "This is one of the best ways to get their attention. Now, left hand on partner's waist."  
  
"Absolutely not!" Hibiki turned from Duero and folded his arms.  
  
"Ahem, Hibiki," Duero interrupted, "Orders are made to be followed."  
  
"Besides, you want to do something SPECIAL for tomorrow, right?" Bart added.  
  
"Don't involve me in your problems!" Hibiki protested.  
  
The officer shook his head. "Once again, left hand on partner's waist...."  
  
The men complied.  
  
"Other hand on partner's shoulder...  
  
"No way.." Hibiki complained.  
  
Bart was still shaking, with a hand each on the platinum-haired officer's shoulder and waist, his face only a foot from his partner's, his eyes quite forced to stare intently once again at his partner's beguiling features.  
  
"Don't be afraid, Garsus. This will not hurt," his partner assured.  
  
"They're crazy!" Jura commented.  
  
"Now, follow after me," the officer's voice was heard again. "One-two- three, one-two-three, one-two-three..."  
  
The women heard the step of boots. "One-two-three, one-two-three, one-two----OW, DUERO!"  
  
"My apologies," the worthy doctor said.  
  
"Dita never realized male mating rituals hurt them so much....poor Uchuujin-san..." Dita noted.  
  
"I never thought it was so....so....numerical," Barnette added.  
  
Misty, the only one on board that could possibly explain the situation, was also confused. "Does it mean that he also knows about heterosexual mating rituals?"  
  
"Aren't they just learning how to dance?" Gascogne reasoned.  
  
"THEM?!" was the unanimous answer, followed by unanimous laughter.  
  
Alone in her room, only Meia Gisborn thought that it was possible. It could only be for tomorrow's festivities.  
  
She was not escaping her fate this time. She wanted to know what the navigator planned to do.  
  
.........  
  
Again, I'm still being careful with the pronouns, just in the opposite way. I told the big spoiler to my cousin who hasn't seen it, and still her jaw dropped. She's the last person I'm telling the spoiler to.  
  
Thank you for waiting. There are rumors that we're having Anatomy next. That means even harder studying coming for me. Hopefully I'll get some time in and work on the next chappie. Hikari won't leave me in peace until I do... ^^ See you all! 


	8. lunch time

Sorry. The chap is now re-uploaded. The computer I initially uploaded on did not have Word, so it ruined the quotes and the dots.  
  
Still so many readers, thank you so much. You make a med student happy. ^^ This got done on a free night. Spoiler warning for those who still don't know, after 7 crazy chapters, because at this point my pronouns might be hard to follow.  
  
........  
  
"I got to peep in there!" one of the less prominent girls confided the next morning at the rec room.  
  
Soon she was surrounded by not less than fifty young women. "Well?"  
  
"They were all just standing there, holding each other at the shoulder and the waist..."  
  
"Standing? Must be tiring!" Dita commented, as many other girls nodded.  
  
"And they were SO, SO stiff!" the informant continued. "The vice- captain was counting so monotonously-------"  
  
"The vice-captain!" many girls gasped. "Helping those guys?!"  
  
"Yup, helping those guys. REALLY, girls, I prefer our mating rituals! Anyway, the vice-captain was counting so, militaristic-like, you know, one, two, three.....one, two, three.......step farther!..........one, two, three.....and every so often, the vice-captain-----"  
  
"Yes, what about the vice-captain?" an alto voice asked behind the storyteller and the pileup of women.  
  
"VICE-CAPTAIN!!"  
  
"Well, you were saying?" the vice-captain had her arms folded in front, and her mouth in a challenging smirk.  
  
"Um, vice-captain," Jura represented the group, "we were just wondering what the four of you were doing down at the male quarters last night."  
  
She sighed, then eyed them mysteriously. "The men were practicing some tactical maneuvers last night."  
  
"But vice-captain, those guys never fight together," Barnette reminded.  
  
"And the doctor doesn't fight at all," Parfet added.  
  
"You will understand, eventually," was the only information the vice- captain added. "By the way," as she looked behind her, "how are the preparations for the celebration?"  
  
BC received a collective sigh.  
  
"Meia already knows, the turkey is burnt, the cake needs to be done over, the streamers are all ruined, the confetti hasn't been cut......" Misty enumerated.  
  
BC shook her head and tsked. "Women...." she muttered under her breath, then gave orders.  
  
"You're not doing this systematically. Jura, take a complete report of the damage. Parfet, commence operations to salvage all usable parts. Barnette, re-evaluate how you understood your manuals, recipe books, whatever you call them. Get Gascogne involved, to keep you all in working order."  
  
When said in that manner, much of the preparation suddenly made sense and had a pattern. Soon everyone was helter-skeltering, in the orderly manner used for battle operations.  
  
"But, vice-captain, what about Meia?" someone asked.  
  
"Let me handle that," the vice-captain assured.  
  
"BC!!" the okashira's voice suddenly boomed through the speakers. "Where are our men? I need Bart on the bridge!"  
  
"Probably, still asleep, okashira," she calmly replied. "We had a long night."  
  
"Exactly WHAT did you four do last night? Now I'm as curious as the rest of the crew!"  
  
"Patience, okashira. In a matter of hours," BC smiled at the monitors.  
  
Below deck in the male quarters, the gentlemen were indeed still fast asleep at 10 in the morning. "Step, two, three, step, two, three, and turn, one, two, three," Hibiki muttered in his dreams. Bart was waltzing with a pillow. "You're a fine dancer, Miss Meia," he praised the pillow. Duero was out cold. The Nirvana would have sounded all its emergency sirens and he would still be asleep, arms folded resolutely over his heaving chest.  
  
By noon, the females sent a representative below. They needed Duero's height for some streamers, others needed Hibiki for some final program plans, and Magno Vivan still needed Bart to steer the Nirvana into a better position.  
  
"Rise and shine, sleepyheads!!" Dita banged on a pot. "Uchuujin-san! It's noon! Time for lunch!"  
  
"Just five more minutes....." Hibiki murmured.  
  
"Have a heart, vice-captain, we practiced until five in the morning...." Bart droned.  
  
Duero answered with a snore.  
  
Dita shook her head. "When that day comes, someday, Dita swears, she will not get Uchuujin-san THIS tired out! Dita will change the mating rituals!" She spoke with such resolution that she held out the ladle like a sword and the pot like a shield. "Dita will change the mating rituals for Uchuujin- san!"  
  
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, WOMAN?!?" that worthy alien protested, now fully awake.  
  
"Aw, come on, Uchuujin-san," Dita came close and fluttered her eyes. "You've visited my room a few times already, but you haven't, um, um, you know, we're still not, you know, so we can't do THAT yet....But when we do, we'll change the mating rituals, right, Uchuujin-san?"  
  
"And what makes you even THINK I'll consider marrying you, woman?!" He threw his most exasperated tone at her.  
  
"Aren't you?"  
  
"Why should I?" He raised his nose.  
  
Little tears began to form at the sides of Dita's eyes, as she lowered her pot and ladle. She sniffed. "Dita is sorry she woke you up, Uchuujin-san. Lunch is ready at the rec room. Some of the girls want you to do something for them. See you tonight, Uchuujin-san." She left the male quarters.  
  
"Dita.....Dita, WAIT!" the pilot ran after her. "That's not what I meant! Come back here, Dita!"  
  
"Shut up and get back to sleep, Hibiki...." Bart muttered from the bed.  
  
In the upper decks, more heltering and skeltering insued. The vice- captain eyed the preparations with only partial interest, and rather walked up and down the corridors deserted by the women.  
  
In one of these corridors, she found Meia, gazing at the vastness of space through the windows.  
  
"They locked all the exit points, and disengaged my Dread's engine. They've even locked all the escape pods," the Dread pilot said. "They want to keep me on the ship."  
  
"Give them credit, Meia. They like you enough to go through all this trouble," BC replied.  
  
"I have no objections to their doing it, vice-captain," she explained. "It's just that, I HATE being the center of attention. I don't know how to conduct myself during these celebrations."  
  
"Maybe a change of clothes would help?" BC offered.  
  
Meia shrugged.  
  
"Come, the okashira knows more about clothes than I do. Let's give those women a little surprise of your own....."  
  
"But why, vice-captain?"  
  
"I want you to look extra special, Meia."  
  
"For the chief navigator?" she asked in a flat tone.  
  
"Do you object?" the vice-captain glanced at her face.  
  
The chief pilot smiled slightly. "Not at all."  
  
Two more hours passed.  
  
"Good morning, everybody," Bart greeted with a yawn as he entered the bridge.  
  
"Good AFTERNOON to you, too, Garsus," the vice-captain tapped him on the shoulder. "It's 2 pm already, and the party starts at 7."  
  
Bart only stared at BC in panic. "Only five more hours! Vice-captain, what am I going to do?!"  
  
"Drive the Nirvana, for starters," BC calmly replied. "The okashira has been asking for you all day."  
  
"But, vice-captain, what about, what about, what about...."  
  
"Stop mumbling, and get to work."  
  
"Hai," he sulked, and popped into the cockpit. He appeared on the screens the next second. "But, vice-captain, what about my gift--------"  
  
"It's fine, Garsus, don't worry. Now, get going!"  
  
............  
  
As promised, responses to two chapters:  
  
Gundamhardcore:: Hi! So happy! GW is back! Duo is back! Man, I realize now that I've missed SO many episodes! I hope you liked this chappie.  
  
Anonymous:: Hope you liked their reactions!  
  
Iudex Acerbus:: I'm glad you finally got it! Thanks for the support!  
  
Sabbie:: I like Duero/Parfet too. No, Hibiki has no regrets, but Dita can get on the nerves. ^^  
  
Stizzo:: Aw, sorry for getting you in trouble. Thanks for the cookie!  
  
Reiven:: Yeah, you're right about the ni-chan, but Magno also alternates if I'm not mistaken. ^^ Thanks for the support. Aoshi has nothing against me. I'll admit he's drop-dead gorgeous. ^^  
  
CardCaptorHikari:: I have nothing much else to say to you. ^^ Thanks always for the support. I still say, I'm sorry. I only watched the end part of D3, so I'm in no position to write for it. I might try my hand at GW, but only after the whole series is done. ^_^  
  
Sir G:: Thanks much! Nope, I'm not a doc, YET. That'll be in four years!  
  
Rx79guntank:: Thanks!  
  
Cat H:: NO kidding, about Hikari. ^^ She asks at least once a week when the next chapter is coming out. ^^  
  
Megane-san_87:: Really? Must've been a human anatomy atlas, since I remember it's a thin book! ^^ Oh, yes, I voted for Movement Stage! I hope it wins!  
  
Dragon-wing-master:: Opo, Pilipino po. ^^ Keep pestering me, I'll try to read your fic one of these weekends. ^^ 


	9. applying the lesson

I apologize for the LONG delay. I can't say I haven't had time. During my absence I've shelled out two GW one-shots, two RK one-shots and the new chapter to Taming a Tiger. Let's say, I haven't had the mindset to make a new chapter. I've been less than genki for such a long time, and you need to be genki to make this crazy fic. Anyways, thanks for waiting, and I hope you like the new chappie. As usual, pronouns kept to an absolute minimum. I'm not sure anymore what pronoun to use anyway. Yes, I do know the correct pronoun but I'm still avoiding an accidental spoiler.  
  
............  
  
"Don't fret, don't fret," Hibiki patted Bart from the back.  
  
"I'M FRETTING! I'M FRETTING!" Bart replied.  
  
"I'll say, more like you're panicking," the Vanguard pilot grinned.  
  
"How come YOU'RE not worried?" the other asked. "Only Duero got those steps perfectly right."  
  
"Me? Worry about that woman? Not in your life!" Hibiki turned his back on him. However, he did not let the navigator see the sudden concern in his eyes upon the mention of "that woman". "What about you? What are you so panicky about? You look swell in that getup."  
  
Indeed he did. Bart Garsus was wearing a pure white tuxedo, complete with coattails and bowtie. The vice-captain owned the elegant ensemble, and being the same size as the navigator it fit Bart quite perfectly. He looked the perfect military gentleman. If only he would stop wringing his hands so much.  
  
"What if she doesn't like it? What if she doesn't dance with me? What if she hates me? What if..."  
  
"It's not like you've done anything she hasn't seen before," Hibiki shrugged. "You've made a fool of yourself too often already!"  
  
Bart grabbed for his shirt.  
  
"Watch the bowtie! I just got it right!"  
  
"And you say you're not worried?" Bart retorted.  
  
"I said, that woman doesn't scare me!"  
  
"You're scared you won't have her turkey at the party tonight 'coz she's mad at you!"  
  
"Say that to my face, you lousy navigator!"  
  
"I just did, you lousy ALIEN!"  
  
"GENTLEMEN! Calm down!" the vice-captain ordered from one corner of the male quarters.  
  
"Easy for you to say, vice-captain!" the navigator sulked into the white tuxedo. "Dita's mad at him, and I don't know if Meia's mad at me or something...in any case, she won't dance with me!"  
  
"I wouldn't say that," BC assured.  
  
"What makes you so sure, sir?" Bart asked with apprehension.  
  
"You will see."  
  
The evening of the birthday party had finally arrived.  
  
Hibiki was busy fumbling at the bowtie and tighter pants, after he fought a lost battle against his unruly hair. Bart continued to pace the tiny quarters back and forth, trying his best to stay neat while releasing some tension. Duero was trying his best to act composed - as he went through the dance steps in his head, over and over and over.  
  
In the meantime, the girls at the upper deck were all getting into their fine linen and jewelry. The usual ooohs and aaaahs of admiration echoed through the recreational area, as the ladies appeared in their low necklines and revealing slits and sleeveless gowns.  
  
"Who took care of Meia's dress for today?" Jura suddenly asked the primping and powdering girls.  
  
"Did you?" Misty looked at Amarone, who shook her head.  
  
"Dita didn't," she admitted, and so did all the other girls.  
  
"You mean, you all forgot to get her a dress?!" Jura yelled. "What, do you expect her to come here in her pilot suit? Who could you all be so careless? Did you want this party to be a failure from the start?..."  
  
"Whoa, whoa, calm down, Jura," Gascogne interrupted the tirade. "Remember...."  
  
"Smile, smile," the crew chorused.  
  
"Very good, girls," the artillery manager grinned, and patted Jura heavily on the back. "Don't worry about your celebrant. I understand someone took care of her party dress."  
  
A few minutes after that, the vice-captain checked on the birthday celebrant and the party dress in question.  
  
"I can't wear this," Meia protested flatly.  
  
She folded her hands and tossed her head at a blue evening gown that lay on her bed.  
  
"You will do me the favor of at least trying it on, Meia," the vice- captain answered rather sternly. "I had to go through several hi-level connections in order to bypass the long waiting list for this dress."  
  
"You did not have to, vice-captain," she retorted, also flatly.  
  
"You are right," he smirked, as he disabled the sound device on his neck, and walked to where she stood. He faced her, eye to eye.  
  
"You don't understand, do you, Meia? I never deserved the kindness the crew has given me all this time. You, on the other hand, deserve all the kindness and concern this crew gives you. You have always thought that you are unworthy, but what have YOU done to disappoint them? Failure in battle? That only comes with the business we are in, and it does not mean you personally disappointed them.  
  
"You do not believe you are capable of being liked. Quite the contrary. The entire crew admires you, and I can name one crew member who admires you more than the rest. This event, the party you are avoiding, is not because the crew has to do it. The crew wants to do it, for you, to show that they admire you as a pilot, a woman, and a friend." He opened the door of her quarters. "Do not disappoint them." He completed his exit and went back to the male quarters.  
  
Meia sighed, and looked down on the dress again. There was indeed no harm in trying it on. She freed herself from the usual pilot suit, and slipped on the blue gown.  
  
The dress fell to her ankles, and had a slit to the side that rose to slightly higher than her knee. It was made of a shimmering, silky material that emphasized her beautiful figure to its fullest, and swayed gracefully with each movement. The cloth ended high enough to reveal only some of her cleavage, and tapered to cover both arms slightly below the shoulders. The ensemble was held up by thin, almost invisible straps that drew one's attention to her elegant neck and shoulders. In its simple refinement, it called attention to the cool beauty of the calm young woman.  
  
Instinctively, she drew her hair back and pinned it close to her head with a hair ornament from a previous birthday. She never wore it before, but it seemed perfect with the dress she had on. She admired the effect, and proceeded to apply a little powder and lipstick.  
  
She could not believe she was doing all this, for a party she did not really want to go to. But for once, she felt the need to look pretty. Not for any of the girls. Not even for herself-although this few of herself was not bad at all.  
  
She had no idea what the navigator had in mind, but she planned to give him a surprise he would never forget.  
  
Just then a rap on her door. "Leader, let's go! The...um....reunion party's starting!"  
  
Meia slipped into the shoes that came with the dress, and answered the door.  
  
Poor Dita, already in a cute pink ensemble, simply gawked.  
  
"What? Anything wrong with the dress?" Meia asked.  
  
"Leader....you look.....beautiful!" Dita ogled further.  
  
Meia's eyes bulged at this, then shook her head to regain reality. "Let's go, Dita." And lead the way.  
  
"Everyone, thank you for coming!" Jura greeted the audience.  
  
Finally she realized that it was useless to keep hiding this birthday party, so instead she was into it full force. The streamers were all in place, the gifts all wrapped, the new turkey cooked just right, and the rest of the food prepared to perfection. All that was left for everyone to do, was party.  
  
"And now, may we introduce our guest of honor for tonight..."  
  
As she turned and flourished, the spotlight fell on a entirely new and astonishing snow queen. And even she, with the entire crew, was speechless at the sight.  
  
Meia searched the rec room for the navigator. As their eyes met from over 10 feet, she gave him a slight smile.  
  
Bart fell into a nearby chair, jaw fully dropped.  
  
Jura on her part completely forget the program in her head. "I...I....um....."  
  
"Get the music and the dancing going, Jura!" Gascogne advised from a corner. "We can worry about the food and the gifts later, when we've gotten used to this angel of beauty before us."  
  
"I....I....um.....sure, Gasco-san. Hit the music, Misty!"  
  
Classical music began to fill the room, as the lights were brought low. Still, everyone was under Meia's spell, and could not move.  
  
Until all heard Bart drive a right fist into his left hand. "Well, no time like the present." He took a very deep breath. "Here goes nothing...."  
  
All eyes were on the navigator, as he stood up with stiff grace, and walked across the room. He seemed to be walking to the vice-captain, now dressed in a dark suit and polished shoes, with hair untied and in an orderly waterfall.  
  
Whispers all around.  
  
"I can't believe this guy! Despite everything, he still likes the vice-captain?!" Jura harrumphed.  
  
"You just wanted the guy for yourself, that's why you're reacting!"  
  
"Shut up, Barnette!"  
  
The navigator kept walking  
  
He stopped in front of the vice captain, and gave BC a slight bow. The vice-captain smiled, and nodded. "Well, Garsus. Get on with it."  
  
"Yes, vice-captain," Bart answered with military stiffness.  
  
He then walked, away from BC.  
  
"What?! He's not dancing with the vice-captain?!" hushed whispers buzzed. "Then...who the heck is he taking? Where is he walking to? What's he gonna do next?"  
  
Only one of them had other things in mind. "Where is Uchuujin-san?!" Dita inquired of anyone in a two-foot radius.  
  
"Never mind Hibiki!" everyone else hissed. "What is Bart doing?"  
  
"He...he's walking toward....Meia!" Misty pointed.  
  
All eyes then turned on the birthday celebrant.  
  
Meia had always been pale, but the Nirvana crew had never seen her so pale before.  
  
A deathly silence fell on the crew. Only his steps crossing the room could now be heard. If it were any more silent, the crew would have also heard Meia's more rapid breaths and heartbeats.  
  
Bart Garsus finally stood before the chief Dread pilot, and just stood there for about a minute. He anxiously looked back at BC, who merely nodded in support.  
  
With new courage, he snapped to attention, cleared his throat, and spoke in his deepest and manliest voice. "Miss Meia."  
  
Aside from the new outlook in life, a crash course in charm had indeed helped the impression Bart Garsus made on the audience, especially the guest of honor. Lost were the cowardly eyes that belied the old debonair words. In its place was a new confidence in himself. It was a transition from bravado, to bravery.  
  
Only her hands betrayed her consternation. They were shaking and sweating. But she slowly looked up at the earnest, serious face of the navigator, and awaited his request.  
  
He offered his right hand with a flourish. "Miss Meia, may I have this dance?"  
  
...........  
  
Of course, this means that I'm almost done with this piece. If all goes well, you will have the ending in two weeks' time. I hope to see you all then! 


	10. test results

Over the course of the time this story was made, I finished an alternate pairing story in RK, started a new one, wrote several RK songfics and oneshots, wrote a Vandread songfic, panicked about med school, got into med school, met a fanfic reader and fan of my work and became her friend, learned to love Gundam Wing, wrote for Gundam Wing thrice, got into the student council, saw my grades rise and fall, saw my grades plummet, and now I'm currently enjoying the first semester break as a medical student.  
  
And so, we come to the end of our tale. Thanks to everybody who accepted this alternate pairing with an open mind and receptive reading eyes. Thanks to everybody for being patient with me. For those who knew about BC beforehand, thanks for enduring the pronouns. For those who didn't, I hope it wasn't too much of a shock to you (it was an awful shock to me when I first found out), and thanks for still reading. I like BC as a character, and I'm glad that, in the end, BC chose to be a pirate. ^^  
  
................  
  
The snow queen had frozen.  
  
She, and the rest of the crew, did not know this man before her.  
  
It was a perfect gentleman. Handsome, refined, elegant. This was not the cowardly navigator of a few hours ago. It was a completely different man. This could not possibly be Bart Garsus.  
  
"Barnette, how many glasses have I had?" Jura confirmed.  
  
"None! Remember? We started with the dancing!" Barnette replied.  
  
"So, this isn't an illusion? I'm not hallucinating? Doctor! Paiway! I need an aspirin!" Jura placed a dramatic hand over her forehead and went hunting for Duero.  
  
"Where is the Pai check when you need it?" Amarone griped.  
  
The Pai check had totally forgotten about her camera, and joined the entire crew in just ogling the scene.  
  
Meia was not sure exactly what she was doing. But she slowly accepted the hand the gentleman in white offered, and stood up.  
  
The gentleman was quite surprised she accepted. His hands shook as he held the precious hand, and escorted the young lady to the center of the room.  
  
"Would you mind, Miss Meia?" he asked in a tone he did not recognize from himself, as he showed her the hand approaching her waist.  
  
She only smiled, and placed a hand on his shoulder.  
  
They began to move to the rhythm of the slow waltz, first hesitantly, then smoothly, moving as one unit, circling the room, looking into each other's eyes, admiring the changes while remembering the similarities.  
  
Amarone gave discreet instructions for Misty to lower the volume of the music, and for Parfet to bring in a spotlight. The music faded a little more, but no spotlight came. Parfet was not manning the lights. Amarone had to tap one of the girls under her to fix it.  
  
"Has anyone seen Parfet?!" Amarone called out.  
  
"She went out with some guy," Celtic answered. "Someone new, although I'm pretty sure there has been no new craft on the ship."  
  
"Tall, long hair?"  
  
"That's it!"  
  
"You mean you didn't recognize the DOCTOR?!"  
  
"Oh, was that him?" Celtic scratched her uncostumed head. "They went that way, to the park area."  
  
Amarone smiled. "Thanks. We better leave those two lovebirds alone."  
  
Meanwhile the waltz had ended, and a new, faster dance had begun. It did not make a difference to the gentleman and lady; they simply continued holding each other and gliding through the room. But at this junction, the spell on the rest of the crew was broken, and they joined in the dancing.  
  
As the girls all grabbed for a partner, Dita circled the periphery of the room for her alien. She eventually found him sulking as he stared through the kitchen at the food.  
  
"Come on, Uchuujin-san! Let's dance!" she pulled at his coattails.  
  
"WATCH THE SUIT!" he snapped.  
  
She pouted. "Uchuujin-san still mad at me?" and started to walk away.  
  
"No...no...NO! That's not it....erm...Dita!" Hibiki stuttered and faltered. "I....I...I'm not mad at you anymore...you just caught me at a bad time this morning, that's all.....I was afraid...um.....you.....were mad at me?" he finished as he twiddled his thumbs before her.  
  
"Of course not, Uchuujin-san!" she happily declared, and grabbed for his hand. "Come on! Dita likes this song!"  
  
The poor alien had no choice but to be dragged along to the dance floor.... willingly.  
  
Hibiki gave full justice to the vice-captain's lessons. He did not step on Dita's shoes; he did not forget the timing; he did not forget to be respectful of his partner. Even Dita was quite surprised. She knew her alien was not the dancing type of alien, but here he was twirling her like a professional.  
  
"So this is what you taught the men last night, BC?" the okashira asked as she approached the vice-captain.  
  
"Hai, okashira."  
  
"You taught those two well," she commended.  
  
"Thank you, okashira," BC answered.  
  
"What about you? Aren't you going to dance?"  
  
BC pressed on the brooch hidden under the suit. "I appreciate the concern, okashira, but these women are all too afraid of me."  
  
"You just think that, BC," she smiled and walked away to the other girls. "Enjoy the evening."  
  
He bowed politely. He smoothed out his dark suit, sighed, then walked to a corner.  
  
Meanwhile, a third, slow dance had started, and Meia and Bart were still on the floor. Bart could only keep his eyes on his partner's face. All of it: her deep blue eyes, light blue hair, lovely cheeks. She in turn admired the gentleman from smooth head to polished shoes.  
  
"I....I....um....Miss Meia..." he began to falter again.  
  
"Meia would be fine, Bart," she interrupted.  
  
"Very well," he cleared his throat, "Meia, thank you for dancing with me tonight. I...I....never thought you would."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
"Although, if you don't mind too much, Me-Meia..." he took a deep breath, "could we....could I....could you......"  
  
"Get on with it, Bart. What is it?"  
  
"I....um......may I please treat you to lunch tomorrow?"  
  
Meia stopped for a few seconds, and looked at him.  
  
Was this Talark resident for real? Lunch on a treat? But she ate alone, always! Of course, she sometimes wished it was not so. Surely Garsus had a motive for this. If he did, however, aside from getting to know her, she did not see it. What if....  
  
Bart began to sweat, terrified at her unyielding stare. "But if you don't want to, Meia, it will be completely alright...this evening is enough for me, thank you....."  
  
"Spaghetti."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Spaghetti will be fine."  
  
Bart's jaw dropped for the second time in an hour. He then regained composure and asked. "With meatballs, lots of cheese? The kind Barnette makes?"  
  
She nodded.  
  
"Wow, you like that too, Miss Meia?" he lit up. "Call me a guy with no finer taste, but I like her spaghetti a lot. It's something about the sauce, I guess.."  
  
"Real tomatoes," she answered with a smile. "Dita uses tomato paste, which doesn't give the same effect."  
  
"And the meatballs...." he continued.  
  
"Just the right size, without too much pepper," she added.  
  
And on they discussed the merits of Barnette's other cooking, then went on to praise Dita's rice casseroles. To the continued astonishment of the crew.  
  
Because by now, majority of the crew was now wired in to an audio feed, controlled by Amarone and Misty. One of the girls had managed to place a small microphone on Bart, which went unnoticed. They were crowded at a laptop placed over a table. Gascogne tsked, the boss scratched her head.  
  
"I never thought Meia liked my spaghetti so much....I would've made it for her more often.." Barnette sighed.  
  
"Wow! Leader likes my casseroles!" Dita clapped.  
  
"Don't you women have anything better to do than spy on Bart?" BC sternly asked in a baritone, arms folded over chest.  
  
"Um....well....vice-captain...." more than one girl gave the vice- captain sheepish looks.  
  
"For the last time, ladies. I have no romantic inclinations toward Garsus. And as you can plainly see, Garsus has eyes on another woman. What he talks about with her is not your concern. Stop spying on him."  
  
With that, BC pulled at the cables.  
  
"Vice-captain!" the girls squealed.  
  
"Back to your places," the vice-captain ordered.  
  
"But, vice-captain...we're not on duty right now!" Dita complained.  
  
"I..um.....you know what I mean," BC ended, and left them.  
  
The girls sulked. But the intelligence about food reminded them about it. Some of the girls went on to the kitchen and served the food.  
  
After ooohs and aaaahs of admiration about Barnette's cake, Celtic's punch, and Dita's alien-inspired turkey casserole; everyone started the eating and drinking.  
  
Hibiki attacked the party food with full relish, much to Dita's enjoyment. She kept him supplied and satisfied. Life was grand for those two.  
  
Parfet and Duero had returned for the food. And no one dared bother the two intellectual lovebirds. They did not know how to interrupt conversations on the citric acid cycle, gluconeogenesis, transamination, and lipid metabolism.  
  
"What the heck is the citric acid cycle, Parfet?" one of her subordinates whispered.  
  
"I'm not too sure yet, but it sounds interesting," Parfet blushed and answered. "I'm humoring the doctor. I let him have it all about statics and electrical communication a while ago."  
  
"But have you done any dancing?"  
  
"Well....we were talking for quite a while about the electrical and anatomical similarities of the human nervous system and Pyoro's circuitry that....well, we haven't. But he did say he learned a thing or two from the vice-captain, and I intend to see it."  
  
The subordinate shrugged and proceeded to the casseroles.  
  
The gentleman of the evening returned to a table where Meia was waiting. In two plates, he carried his and her dinner food. He presented with the flair of his heritage, a good sampling of all the dishes available. "Here we have the ever-popular turkey casserole, heated to perfection then topped with a fine layer of cheese by my annoying roommate's girlfriend. And over here we have Jura's long standing, forever- lasting potato salad...."  
  
Meia giggled at the descriptions, but enjoyed his comedic relish. Of all the times she thought he was simply annoying, he might actually be...interesting to know more about.  
  
"Enough description," she finished with more giggles. "Shall we eat already?"  
  
She could not believe it. She was actually, enjoying the evening! Maybe Bart wasn't so bad, after all! She would give him a chance. She would learn more about him, at lunch tomorrow.  
  
He could not believe it either. He never thought it could be possible. But Meia the snow queen, a true woman, a woman of the type difficult to claim, had accepted him. She had finally welcomed his advances. He was the happiest human existing at that precise moment.  
  
He knew who was responsible for his success.  
  
"Um, Meia, would you excuse me for a while? I have to go find the vice- captain," he said.  
  
She nodded. He skipped off.  
  
He eventually found BC staring out the windows of the rec room, leaning at a corner.  
  
"Vice-captain, I owe you big time for tonight," he bowed before him with military stiffness. "Thank you very much for all the help."  
  
"Don't mention it," BC replied without looking at him.  
  
Bart smiled and turned to leave, when a thought stopped him. "Um, sir, if you don't mind my asking, why DID you agree to help me?"  
  
BC remained silent for a moment, then answered. "You were pathetic, hopeless, annoying, and overly dramatic."  
  
Bart sighed.  
  
"But you were sincere. Sincerity, in the end, wins most women. That's the reason."  
  
"I understand," Bart replied.....then pumped BC's hand. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, vice-captain! You won't regret what you did. I'll use it well!"  
  
"You better, if you want to keep Meia," a shaken BC smiled slightly. "Now go on and get back to her."  
  
Bart saluted and obeyed.  
  
As the party moved along, as birthday songs were sung, food eaten and dances danced, BC continued to stare at the moon rocks outside the window.  
  
"So, we all live happily ever after, right?" Gascogne approached BC at the corner.  
  
"I suppose," the vice-captain answered absentmindedly. He looked wistfully at the white tuxedo and blue evening dress enjoying their evening together.  
  
"Never knew you had it in you to be a matchmaker," Gascogne further teased him. He only smirked in reply.  
  
They both looked at the lovely pair, as Gascogne put a hand on BC's shoulder.  
  
"You know, Tenmei, you don't have to keep proving yourself to us. We all know what you can do, and we all know that you're one of us. So stop trying to be extra nice. Doesn't suit you," she grinned.  
  
The vice-captain smiled at this, in spite of himself.  
  
The music had looped, and it returned to the first waltz.  
  
"Come on, stop moping," she slung an arm across his back. "How about a dance, you and me? My waltzing needs practice, care to help out?"  
  
"I...um...."  
  
"What's a waltz between friends, aye, BC? I'm the oldest friend you've got."  
  
"But that's..."  
  
"Don't say you didn't enjoy building up the Nirvana even a little? Come on, let's talk about the good old days."  
  
BC smiled, and offered an elegant hand. "Shall....we dance?"  
  
"It'll be my pleasure, old friend," Gascogne replied.  
  
........  
  
If you don't know why that's possible, remember it was mentioned once that BC and Gasco-san are Magno's longest-standing crew members. BC was already around when Meia was first recruited. Rhesus A-I hope this chapter answers your question.  
  
Supreme thanks to everybody who read......um, what was that long-named fic about Meia? ^_^ I know a lot of you had trouble remembering the long title. Thanks so much for reading! I like misunderstood characters, and I hope this little comedy helped you to better appreciate the three most misunderstood people in Vandread. ^^  
  
Thanks first to everybody:  
  
Sabbie-ShadowD-Megane-san87-USSKenji-The Untalkative Bunny-AoiKachina_KWT- Martina-Unproductivity-BKM2K3-MarekVII-Cinderella_semantan-Mister kungfu- Zauriel-Sir G-Gundamhardcore-Alien freak-Bringer of Death-Misty Cornwell- Beko-Man-Lord Mick-Iudex Acerbus-Fanfic reader-Stizzo-Reiven- CardCaptorHikari-Rx79guntank-Cat H-Dragon-Wing-Master-Eros4-Rhesus A-Stizzo- Metajoker-Genjyo Sanzo-and several anonymous reviewers  
  
Thanks much to Spike and the Vandread Fanfic Library for archiving my work. They're at www .angelfire. com/anime4/spike558  
  
Final review replies:  
  
Eros4-Thanks. Sorry for the trouble about those quotes. I hated that happening, too.  
  
Stizzo-Thanks for liking the pacing!  
  
Megane-san_87-Klingon mating ritual?! Now that is way creepy... ^^ I'm not sure if this chap is romantic enough for you, but I hope you like it.  
  
Iudex Acerbus-Yup, you have your ending. ^^  
  
Sabbie-I'd really like to know what med school program Duero got into, to be such a cool doctor at 17!! He's a practicing doc at 17! ^^  
  
Gundamhardcore-Cartoon Network in my country (finally!) has GW at weekends. When the previous chappies were written, GW was shown on weekdays.  
  
Sir G-Thanks much for liking it!  
  
Metajoker-Really? Thanks a lot!  
  
CardCaptor Hikari-Oh, sure those words can be used! Those words actually got me going after the long hiatus. This fic requires a certain mindset I haven't had for a long time, and those magic words put me back in gear. Thanks for enduring everything...including David Anders insanity. ^^  
  
Fanfic reader-Sorry you came at the second to the last chappie. Hope you liked it!  
  
Cat H-Thanks for the reviews! Ranma and Akane fight in another way from Dita and Hibiki, because resistance in D/H is one-sided but in R/A in runs both ways. ^^ No, no. Jura has been linked to Bart in the series, not the vice-captain. As a partner in crime, mostly, not exactly romantically. Oh, yeah, Duero's such a prince charming if he wants to be.  
  
Genjyo Sanzo-Yes, I'm ending it here. Why? Because it can't go any further. ^^ Hope you liked it all the same.  
  
Once again, thank you so much for all the support and patience with How to Impress a Girl 101. It was a blast making this fic, thank you for reading!  
  
EK out. 


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